T&C Day 3 - Changing The Transaction

Checking in with you on day 3 of this trip to San Diego and I’ve got some good stuff to share…

Last night, we went to some sort of rooftop cocktail mixer bla bla bla whatever thing, and it was pretty great, met a few cool people, but the best part was this insight I had.

So my friend David was asking me a question about how I felt about conferences/events, and our conversation was like this…

D: “How do you feel about coming to these events?”

N: “I think not too long I felt like it was a burden on my routine and momentum, now I kind of like the challenge of “can I be who I say I am” in an uncontrolled environment?”

D: “What do you mean by an uncontrolled environment?”

And right at that moment, one of the servers walked by with a tray full of these fried egg rolls and asked us if we wanted one.

We both said no but I saw that as a perfect opportunity to explain my point.

N: “It’s like what just happened there. Those egg rolls are what I mean by an uncontrolled environment. When I’m at home, almost everything is in my control. I have control of my diet, of my routine, who I want to spend time with, and so on.”

D: “Right.”

N: “But when we come out into all of these events, everything is super random and for the most part unpredictable. I say I don’t want the “eggrolls” which could be a metaphor for anything, but when they’re right in front of my face and being offered to me, do I stay true to what I tell myself? Or do I lie to myself and indulge?”

And I really do believe that’s a great way to look at these temptations that pop up in life.

It’s like a server walking by with a tray full of whatever your vice is, and asking you if you’d like to indulge…

“Excuse me sir, would you like some belligerent drinking?”

“Excuse me sir, could I interest you in some unprotected sex?”

“Excuse me sir, would you like to abuse amphetamines for two weeks straight and drain your dopamine receptors?”

You have the choice of how you’re going to act.

And here’s the gold nugget…

I think when we relabel what those things are, we can then start to make the right decisions because we can see our actions for what they really are.

For me, it’s not just a little break from my diet…

It’s me entirely fucking up my momentum, lying to myself, and getting myself one step further away from what I truly want.

So when the temptation to go be a fatass and eat 4000 calories in one sitting presents itself…

It becomes a decision of “Do I want to fuck up my momentum, lie to myself, and get myself one step further away from what I truly want?” instead of “Do I want to take a little break from my diet?”

Two very different transactions.

Two very different outcomes.